Adult swinger parties

 

If you are about to attend a swinger party for the first time you will probably be nervous for a start and will also be wondering what the rules are. We have tried to cover most situations and you need to know that most swinger establishments go on the premise that NO means NO.

If a guy begins to pester you and you are not happy about it tell him no and if he becomes persistent tell someone and the likelyhood is that he will be thrown out.

Do we have to do anything at a party?

Absolutely not and this is the most common misconception about swinging and the thing that stops many couples or single ladies from even dipping their toes in the water.

If you are considering the possiblity of doing something about your curiosity about trying out swinging in the UK you would not even be reading this page.

So to give you comfort it is perfectly acceptable to go to a party and do absolutely nothing for the first time or even every time until you feel totally happy and comfortable with what you do. You might even find that simply sitting there and watching is enough for you to enjoy and be turned on and then you or you and your partner can imagine this when you have sex separately.

If you go as a couple you don't have to get involved with other swingers or other couples or singles, you can go to enjoy being watched by others and leave it at that. Never worry about letting others know why you are there and they will respect your boundaries.

As you go each time you may begin to feel more and more confident about dipping that toe in a little further and perhaps involve either another single lady swinger or single man to try out a threesome.

The golden rule of swinging is 'no means no' and should someone proposition you at a party a polite refusal won't offend. It is no different from a refusal whensomeone asks you out on a date.

If you are fully dressed then it is extremely unlikely to even be approached for anything other than a friendly chat. Also, remember that at any swinging event there will probably be other first-timers every bit as nervous as you - possibly even more so. Everyone knows this because everyone was a first-timer once. You will also find that most swingers are very friendly and extremely open people and one of the nicest things about the scene is they way that people are considerate of each others feelings.

So why no go along and check it out and if when you are there you don't want to play then don't. If you only want to play with each other then that's fine. I have to be honest though that not many people who get that far turn back but if you do then at least you can say that you gave it a go and it will stop you wondering any more.

What is the joy of swinging?

For attractive young men and women who enjoy sex, the hardest part of even the most wonderful relationship is monogamy. In fact monogamy goes against our very human instinct so swinging is extremely natural. There are a number of reasons that many do not venture into the swinger scene which include: the opinion of others; the desire not to hurt your partner; avoiding the feeling of guilt are all among the reasons people appear to stay monogamous.

We all know that when the opportunity presents itself, both men and women stray all too easily even if they are enjoying a loving relationship.This is driven by the thrill of sexual adventure which is so powerful that we tend to follow it impulsively even when it threatens our happiness. Beleive you me this does not only apply to men - women are just as likely to stray into swinging.

We are actually all biologically programmed to be like this - the optimum procreative strategy for both sexes is monogamy plus adultery. So for a couple that love each other but are unable honestly to say to each other "I am never going to have, or want to have, sex with another person while we are lovers", swinging can be the answer.

Swinging allows a couple to have sexual variety in the context of a loving relationship; constantly reaffirms the desirability of each partner in the eyes of the other; completely blows away the need or temptation for sexual deceit; provides sexual opportunities that are not really available to single people; and removes the prime cause of relationship breakdown.

As each partner is instrumental in providing the other with fantastic sexual experiences beyond the hope of most people, swinging can actually reinforce the bonds between a couple.

Who should swing?

We would recommend swinging to couples who are both sexually self-confident and adventurous and who don't want emotional fulfilment to mean sexual retirement. That may seem obvious but many couples try swinging for reasons that differ from this and not all of them are disastrous.

If you share your innermost sexual wishes and fantasies together.

If acting them out together would bring you closer rather than provoke jealousy.

If you are proud of your lover and want to show him or her off in an atmosphere where their talents will be appreciated.

If having other people present would heighten your sexual enjoyment.

If you both want to do things with your bodies that you cannot do by yourselves.

If you would find making love with your lover and other people mind-expanding and self-esteem enhancing:

then you should consider swinging.

Be honest though as not everyone's relationship is cut out for swinging. Many people's sexual self-confidence does not extend to being happy about their lover having sex with other people, even when the quid pro quo is that they themselves can do so. Many couples are helped by swinging - in almost a theraputic way - when one partner cannot satisfy all the sexual needs of the other. For example, it is very common for couples to come into swinging because of the female partner's desire for bisexual experiences.

So long as both partners stick to their agreed rules, things will tend to go well. Some couples who have been swingers for years have never had penetrative sex with anyone other than themselves. There are also couples where one partner feels the need to catch up on sexual experience without abandoning the relationship. This is most often the situation of young women dating older men. Women in their late teens or early twenties can feel that missing out on the sexual adventure their peers are enjoying spoils the fun of a settled relationship with an older man. In these circumstances swinging parties allow a young woman to fulfill the need for experience and attention without excluding her regular lover.

"He/she really wanted to do it, so I was prepared to give it a try" is often heard and again it can work if swinging goes on to become a joint pastime. There is an adage in American swinging about female newbies being dragged reluctantly into clubs at 8pm and having to be dragged out again at 8am. However, there are also couples where the woman is not really interested in sex herself, but is prepared to let hubby off the leash for a night to buy peace and quiet the rest of the time.

The oldest chestnut of all is "We were bored so we did it to try and stay together". If a couple have a strong relationship this can work. But if there are other strains or difficulties in the relationship, swinging will not help.

Things start to go awry when one partner comes along to a swinging event against their better judgement. The keen partner will try to persuade the reluctant one to join in. Once refused, he or she will ask permission to be allowed to join in by himself/herself. The reluctant partner will then feel they are losing control of the situation, and a row ensues. Always talk things through before you get the a swnger party! It is better to have any rows that might happen in the privacy of your own home rather than at a party where there are other people.

One option is to agree that you won't do anything the first time you come to a party. That way the ice can be broken more slowly and the reluctant partner may realise that his or her misgivings are not based on reality.

Swinging parties

Parties are the best way of meeting other couples interested in recreational sex and learning the ins and outs of swinging. Of course the other way is to meet up with other singles looking for a couple to have fun or another couple on our adult dating number. By meeting with just one couple or a single person lessens the pressure and you can then have a more intimate swinger session.

Of course you can also speak with people to meet up with other swingers at swinger parties being arranged if you decide against the two-on-two meetings or two on one meeting route.

At a party the ice is easy to break as everybody knows why everyone else is there. Nobody is expecting a sexual interaction with you and your partner in particular so there is absolutely no pressure. You get to see what happens before deciding whether it tempts you - and if it doesn't you still have a pleasant and interesting evening. Parties are also the highest expression of swinging because of the possibilities for exhibitionism and group sex.

Nothing is as spectacular as a group scene at a party because they are exactly how everyone imagines orgies to be. There are a lot of swinging parties held in Britain every weekend by individuals, contact clubs, health / nudist clubs and the few on-premises swinging clubs that manage to survive the PC police.

How do I start swinging?

You can start by calling this number 0982 666 4101 and register your name and details and wait for the calls to come flooding in. Alternatively, you could call the same number and browse the adds that are already there and find your perfect swinging match!

Good luck and happy swinging!

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